2024/5/29

I feel even LESS tempted to work for Dr S. Things has changed. Not only I don't like people surrounding him this time - imagine men with little bit of power and money and they thought they are on top of the world and speak of women as playthings - the company is already too big and complicate but not big enough and structured well enough like… let’s say Google? Microsoft? Most of the engineers worked there when I was there had left. Nowadays is a different group of people, they are in pre-IPO and everyone’s acting they are millionaires. I was disgusted by the things they said at the table once Dr S left, such as naked air hostess, and brag about the many wives he has, I think Dr S knows well enough what kind of person they are.

Anyway, I received Dr S’s message about ‘inviting me to build the business with them’, ‘It’s already built isn’t it?’ I replied. ‘I think you can be the new chief in device fabrication.’ He said. The whole thing feels sketchy af. Last time I offered him my quantum dots he remained quiet, and he looked displeased when I mentioned again. He doesn’t give a s- about device performance, new experiments anymore. I politely rejected him and told him I’m working on a new project with my friend.

Things also went really fast the last two weeks when I squeeze my shower and dinner time to work. Had a complete night without sleep before hardening and submit. Ran into a lot of dark thoughts.

…

Woke up and saw some news again. Thought about him again.

😪

It’s been years. He probably has someone. Or a few new. The thought makes me feel sick inside. It’s only me that’s getting nowhere. I need to get this sorted.