2025/5/19

Watching Nara Smith videos on TikTok. God I love that woman. I found her before she was famous (during lock down I think?) and she considered to have a paid website to sell her recipe etc.. obviously that didn’t happened when she was famous all over the internet soon. I even watched their video on YouTube, how they met, that made me like Lucky a bit more since he looked more human compared to his photoshoots.

I used to think she has the life I wanted- tasty, home made food; a couple of kids; cute husband who’s obsessed with her; pretty clothes (yes I 100% agree with dress up to cook and eat). Now I really don’t know anymore. My life trajectory wasn’t graced by fate, that my love story happened at 17, or even 27. I missed having a boyfriend in school, in college, I missed the time to believe fairytales. And the older I grow the more I understand I won’t be satisfied by the lifestyle she presents. Something called pain and ambition grew, and there isn’t a simple way to end it.