2024/10/13

This morning my brain went through a series of random stuff (as usual) such as apples, okra, braised beef, Isreal, dolphins, and the mysterious pet food I found upstairs. We don’t have pet food in this shape. I also stared at the curtain for some time.

thought about a few more things and people.

Bored.

Grandpa came to visit. Taught him how to use usb sticks and find files. Heard some new family drama.

He discussed the health of my aunt’s in law with my mum, and told her not to save him or send him to hospital when he’s very ill.

‘Don’t save me. I don’t want more treatments. It’s more suffer than living. I would rather die in sleep with dignity. Am I right?’ He asked us.

I almost laughed. Last month my mum said the exact thing to me. It made me really upset. Now it’s my mum’s turn.

She made some mumbling sound and didn’t answer.

‘What’s that thing called, where they inject you with medicine so you can die in peace?’

‘Euthanasia?’ My mum said. ‘No, no. Also none of your children would agree.’

He plans to travel to the south in winter. ‘It might be my last trip.’ He said. ‘I feel heavy and wobbly walking. It’s a part of aging.’ He said to me while looking at my expression.

I left them alone when he start telling my mum about my aunt’s family matter. He’s bothered. A few weeks ago he was bothered with my mum’s divorce. I figured no matter how old you are you’ll always worry about your children’s wellbeing.

Like I suspected- the job market is a lot better this year. (Consider the quantum dot and device fabrication jobs I got in my inbox.) ZZL told me he got some jobs from banking. 😂Are there no other jobs in the UK? Almost all the physics PhDs I know are doing finance. He asked me what I’m doing I said I’m not interested in a career in finance.

It’s less fun that you are not in the UK. He said.

Haha really? I said. We didn’t meet up very often anyways when I was in London. I thought.

Yeah. Everyone has left. He said.

Yeah I don’t really want to go back. They detained me at the border and the police ignored my request. Second class citizen life. I said.

Not to say the racism. lol.

True. He said. Not home after all. ZZ is leave too.

What? Really? I asked. Italy?

Is Nanjing in Italy? He said.

Oh ok. I said.

Italy pays too little. He said.